Revisions

I used to think

that I wanted lust

Chemical connection

Until I saw

The sweet purity

Of a smile,

Of love through understanding.

Of the space between the moments

Of touch,

Of play,

Of lips, tongues, foreheads

Quietly connecting.

I used to confuse

Lust for love.

Then I loved you.

The tenderness

Of a hug,

Of your smile, admiring a gift

I’d remembered to give,

Of a video

I’d remembered to record.

Then I loved the exhale

You’d breathe

When you’d pull me tighter.

The melting into my hand,

Your head giving way

under my fingertips.

The stories you tell

When I need distraction from tears.

The moments of happiness we share.

I could watch that smile

Creep across your face,

Those eyes soften,

Those shoulders relax,

Every day for the rest of my life

And just be happy.

I thought I wanted you

When you lusted after me.

Now I need you

To hold my hand,

Simply

Loving you,

In the quiet moments,

Of tenderness.

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